If you talk the talk then you have to walk the walk
Have you ever given a friend some advise only to find that when you face a similar situation all of that good sound advice goes out the window?
Or what about December 31st year after year....do you talk a good game about all of the things you're going to do differently in the incoming year with your list of resolutions?
Better yet...you're sick and tired of the same old, same old so you try to reinvent yourself every once in a while with a new do, different style accessories or wardrobe but you fall into the same patterns?
WELL......All of those things have happened to me.
Its very easy to dish out advice that sounds so practical, and may even be helpful for your friend. They LOVE YOU for it. But then days pass and you go through the same exact thing, and its not until you fail miserably at the test that you realize....MAN, I should have listed to my own advice.
As a teenager I thought it was cool that all of my friends had new years resolutions: going to the gym, getting better grades, not eating so many sweets, shop less save more--you name it. Year after year I'd say things like that and come up with a new "New Year's Resolution", or a few, only to find that by the second week of the year I was failing miserably at my own stupid promises. Then I felt worse off than what I did before I made the dumb resolutions in the first place! Go figure.
Finally, every so often I get sick of life. Can you relate? Everything bugs me. People-- they're all idiots. My job-- I can never get a break. My family-- they only look for me when they want something. Boyfriend-- don't even get me started. The truth of the matter is, when I'm in a funk, it's everyone's fault but mine, and I'm sick of it. The best part is I'm even sick of me. I'm sick of the monotony of life, and well the melancholic me. I hope I'm not the ONLY one this ever happens to. So then what happens? I feel like * LIGHT BULB * let me reinvent myself! 1) Haircut 2) Change my nail style 3) Whole new wardrobe 4) Retail Therapy! 5) Practice a lot of selfcare to make me "feel pretty". You name it I've done it. Then everything is FIXED, right? RIGHT!?!
Wrong. After a few days, weeks, months-- however long it takes-- I'm back in the slum. Now that's not to say that I completely failed, but the fact of the matter is if you talk the talk then you have to walk the walk. You can't say that you want change, but only change the superficial. You have to get to the root of the problem. You can't only dish great advice that looks great on the books but has no practical value in your own life. Practice what you preach and be an example of what you teach. And finally, you have to be realistic with yourself and the goals you set out for yourself. Not to say that resolutions are bad or that "I'm gonna get my life back" epiphanies are useless. Any realization or wake up call to do and be better should be welcomed in your life, BUT its what you do about it that matters.
I'm gonna be honest. Since my post about saving your coins, its been a real uphill battle for me to squash my debt. I was so sure I was going to finish even before my goal. Here it is, October 1st (ALREADY!!!! IT'S ALMOST CHRISTMAS) and time feels like its closing in on me, but I had to remind myself that one of my pieces of advice was to be flexible! So, if I don't meet that goal, guess what? I'm gonna set another short term one that I can meet.
Even better. Since my last post a few days go I've been tested every which way on how to react to situations. Even with the smallest things. A few hours ago. I couldn't get inside my home, and all the people with keys who could help me were unresponsive. So I stood outside for 20 mins, and then my cell phone died. Finally, I got in two minutes later. Was I mad? YES! Did I blow up? No. I took a minute and reflected and just thought of my last post and said well, you advised others on doing this and that and here you are.
It's hard. Life is hard. It costs us to be at peace and smooth sailing before, after, and even during the storm. But it is possible. We don't have to live in misery. We don't have to isolate ourselves. But we do have to recognize our problem areas if we want to be better.
Let's be honest. We NEED to be better. There is always room for improvement. There is always someone who can be touched by our growth. Our stories are meant to touch and help others. No you're not perfect and no you don't have it 100% together, but your story can be all the difference for someone else going through what you went through.
So yes, give the advice; make the resolution; make the impromptu change. But don't stop there. Don't let it be just talk. Don't let it be just words. Let the actions ensue. Actions truly speak louder than words. I know that I don't want to get advice from someone who is worst off than me or who has NO IDEA what I'm going through.
Don't be that person who is discredited because what they say doesn't match with how they behave. My grandmother always told me you can attract more flies with honey. It's true. Don't just talk the talk. Walk the walk. Do all of the things you set out to do, and be the person you set out to be. The only one stopping you is YOU!
Or what about December 31st year after year....do you talk a good game about all of the things you're going to do differently in the incoming year with your list of resolutions?
Better yet...you're sick and tired of the same old, same old so you try to reinvent yourself every once in a while with a new do, different style accessories or wardrobe but you fall into the same patterns?
WELL......All of those things have happened to me.
Its very easy to dish out advice that sounds so practical, and may even be helpful for your friend. They LOVE YOU for it. But then days pass and you go through the same exact thing, and its not until you fail miserably at the test that you realize....MAN, I should have listed to my own advice.
As a teenager I thought it was cool that all of my friends had new years resolutions: going to the gym, getting better grades, not eating so many sweets, shop less save more--you name it. Year after year I'd say things like that and come up with a new "New Year's Resolution", or a few, only to find that by the second week of the year I was failing miserably at my own stupid promises. Then I felt worse off than what I did before I made the dumb resolutions in the first place! Go figure.
Finally, every so often I get sick of life. Can you relate? Everything bugs me. People-- they're all idiots. My job-- I can never get a break. My family-- they only look for me when they want something. Boyfriend-- don't even get me started. The truth of the matter is, when I'm in a funk, it's everyone's fault but mine, and I'm sick of it. The best part is I'm even sick of me. I'm sick of the monotony of life, and well the melancholic me. I hope I'm not the ONLY one this ever happens to. So then what happens? I feel like * LIGHT BULB * let me reinvent myself! 1) Haircut 2) Change my nail style 3) Whole new wardrobe 4) Retail Therapy! 5) Practice a lot of selfcare to make me "feel pretty". You name it I've done it. Then everything is FIXED, right? RIGHT!?!
Wrong. After a few days, weeks, months-- however long it takes-- I'm back in the slum. Now that's not to say that I completely failed, but the fact of the matter is if you talk the talk then you have to walk the walk. You can't say that you want change, but only change the superficial. You have to get to the root of the problem. You can't only dish great advice that looks great on the books but has no practical value in your own life. Practice what you preach and be an example of what you teach. And finally, you have to be realistic with yourself and the goals you set out for yourself. Not to say that resolutions are bad or that "I'm gonna get my life back" epiphanies are useless. Any realization or wake up call to do and be better should be welcomed in your life, BUT its what you do about it that matters.
I'm gonna be honest. Since my post about saving your coins, its been a real uphill battle for me to squash my debt. I was so sure I was going to finish even before my goal. Here it is, October 1st (ALREADY!!!! IT'S ALMOST CHRISTMAS) and time feels like its closing in on me, but I had to remind myself that one of my pieces of advice was to be flexible! So, if I don't meet that goal, guess what? I'm gonna set another short term one that I can meet.
Even better. Since my last post a few days go I've been tested every which way on how to react to situations. Even with the smallest things. A few hours ago. I couldn't get inside my home, and all the people with keys who could help me were unresponsive. So I stood outside for 20 mins, and then my cell phone died. Finally, I got in two minutes later. Was I mad? YES! Did I blow up? No. I took a minute and reflected and just thought of my last post and said well, you advised others on doing this and that and here you are.
It's hard. Life is hard. It costs us to be at peace and smooth sailing before, after, and even during the storm. But it is possible. We don't have to live in misery. We don't have to isolate ourselves. But we do have to recognize our problem areas if we want to be better.
Let's be honest. We NEED to be better. There is always room for improvement. There is always someone who can be touched by our growth. Our stories are meant to touch and help others. No you're not perfect and no you don't have it 100% together, but your story can be all the difference for someone else going through what you went through.
So yes, give the advice; make the resolution; make the impromptu change. But don't stop there. Don't let it be just talk. Don't let it be just words. Let the actions ensue. Actions truly speak louder than words. I know that I don't want to get advice from someone who is worst off than me or who has NO IDEA what I'm going through.
Don't be that person who is discredited because what they say doesn't match with how they behave. My grandmother always told me you can attract more flies with honey. It's true. Don't just talk the talk. Walk the walk. Do all of the things you set out to do, and be the person you set out to be. The only one stopping you is YOU!
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