How to Stay Strong in the Middle of the Storm

We have all heard the phrase "patience is a virtue" at some point in our lives.  Virtue can be defined as a "behavior showing high moral standards."  But how hard is it to be patient or to exhibit that "virtue" when we are going through something. And when I say something I mean SOMETHING.  There are times when we go through a little test, and while it is inconvenient, we get through it and it doesn't phase us.  But what about those times when you can't seem to get a break? Or when no matter what you do nothing seems to go right? What about when you've prayed and cried about a situation/person/thing, and your answer seems further away than it should be.  

Its hard.  I've had my share of storms, and am by no means an expert at this but there is a way to stay strong in the middle of the storm.  Some things are easier said than done, but practicing these little things can help you keep your peace when the world is roaring around you.  

1) COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS

No matter what I'm going through it helps me to count my blessings.  I like to start with the things we overlook daily, like our health and that God gave us one more day to live and get it right.  These are huge and the foundation for the other blessings we have. Without health we wouldn't be able to go to work and to do the many things we do in the day.  With each day that God gives us, we have another chance to start over and make today better than yesterday.  

2) REFLECT BEFORE YOU REACT

I'm a firm believer that everything happens for a reason.  It is important to take a moment to reflect on the situation before reacting.  Human impulse is a very tricky thing and can make or break us in our trying times.  Being impulsive almost never ends well.  Instead of reacting angrily we should take a step back and think.  Is this moment worth ruining the rest of my day? What can I learn from this? It makes a world of difference when we choose to reflect in the moment rather shoot off at the mouth and complain.  Your mindset and your emotional state depend on your immediate reaction to a problem.  You owe it to yourself to reflect before you react. 

3) TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR ACTIONS

This is the hardest thing for me to do.  Oftentimes its easier to place the blame.  Who am I kidding? It is ALWAYS easier to blame others, but there's strength in recognizing our faults.  Realizing that we made a mistake and proactively correcting the error and/or learning from it are huge signs of growth.  Taking responsibility for your actions is a huge factor in staying strong in the middle of the storm.  It allows us to use the time to brainstorm on possible solutions.  That keeps us from wallowing in sorrow and brooding in self-pity, while affording us an opportunity to grow.  Take this experience and use it for the next time!

4) DON'T BE SO HARD ON YOURSELF

This is a major step as well.  Some of us are such perfectionists that we never live up to our own expectations.  Others feel as though no matter what we do it will never go well with us, and we will never see the results we hope for.  Neither of these are true.  Whether you made a mistake or you're just trying to navigate through this thing we call life, take it easy on yourself! You'll never be able to get all of that weight and stress off your shoulder when you are your biggest critic.  When you ease off the pressure, your mind will feel the relief it needs to think.  If at first you don't succeed, dust your shoulders off and try it again! You'd be surprised by what you can do when you give yourself a break.  

5) LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE

I might get some kick back for this, but its true-- there's always going to be someone who is worst off than us.  You lost your job? There's someone out there who hasn't been able to find employment for three months.  They raised your rent? There's a family living in the shelter right now just waiting for an apartment? You're sick, or have just been diagnosed with something? There's someone who has been in the hospital and has been told they have a few weeks to live.  The list can go on.  Sometimes we think our problem is the end of the world, when in reality we are fortunate. FORTUNATE.  This is not to say that what you're going through is not a big deal, but instead a reminder that what we think we can't possibly handle can always be worse.  

6) REMEMBER THAT JESUS LOVES YOU

This can be an afterthought for us.  In the situation we feel so alone.  God feels so far.  It feels like He's not even listening.  The fact of the matter is he is nearer to us than we can imagine.  He will never allow us to go through something that we cannot bear.  No matter what it feels like, God reminds us of his love by showing us his favor and mercy throughout our storm.  We just have to be attentive enough to see it.  

MY STORY:

This week was a hard week for my family and I.  I returned from a much needed vacation only to find out that my mother had been bed bound for at least a week.  She went to the ER, got an MRI and was sent home with medication and told to come back if she got worse.  After revising the MRI, her pain management doctor, who was on vacation, advised that she a Neuro-Surgeon.  My dad and I accompanied my mother to the Neuro-Surgery Clinic and she was admitted that day.  They kept her in the hospital for 7 days, and did an emergency surgery on her.  The issue was a fragment of one of her discs was impinging on her sciatic nerve which was giving her excruciating pain from her lower back down her left leg. 

Because I just came back from work, I didn't have vacation days to just stay with my mom.  I had to figure out how to juggle work and help my dad out. My dad stood in the hospital with my mom the night before her surgery because he was so worried about her, but the administration of the hospital told him that because she's in an all female room he was not supposed to be in the room.  Starting Thursday night I've spent every night with my mom sleeping on the "hard as a rock" reclining chair.  Despite how bad it looks and feels-- I need some gooooooood quality sleep on my own bed-- God has shown us his favor!

My mom's surgery had no complications.  She didn't need a drainage and her wound has been healing excellently despite the 17 staples.  After just three days my mom is walking better and doing better in Physical Therapy.  She has no pain down her leg, just the normal pressure and discomfort from her wound.  When she couldn't walk she was wheeled to the bathroom.  When she couldn't sleep she was moved to another room.  I was able to be by her side every night, and God willing she will be discharged tomorrow.  

She went through a week and a half of agonizing pain, but now she is pain free! Although my parents spent their 28th wedding anniversary in the hospital last night, we are beyond blessed.  Despite spending my weekend in the hospital, God is faithful and his mercy endures forever.  

I say this to say that no matter what we go through there is a purpose.  And despite how bad it looks its always important to be grateful and reflect so that way we can have peace of mind in all of the chaos.  Putting on the Whole Armor of God is how we stay strong in the middle of the storm. It is not always easy but it is always possible.  Nothing we go through is meant to kill us, only to make us stronger!